Radiohead
"No Surprises"
A heart that's full up like a landfill
A job that slowly kills you
Bruises that won't heal
You look so tired and unhappy
Bring down the government
They don't, they don't speak for us
I'll take a quiet life
A handshake of carbon monoxide
No alarms and no surprises
No alarms and no surprises
No alarms and no surprises
Silent, silent
This is my final fit, my final bellyache with
No alarms and no surprises
No alarms and no surprises
No alarms and no surprises please
Such a pretty house, such a pretty garden
No alarms and no surprises (let me out of here)
No alarms and no surprises (let me out of here)
No alarms and no surprises please (let me out of here)
Thursday, February 22, 2007
Wednesday, February 21, 2007
40 Things
I'm going through meme-withdrawal, so I'll post a lame one, just to get me a step nearer to the magic 300, when I mothball this blog and migrate to my main one.
40 things
1. What did you do in 2007 that you’d never done before?
Had my pet euthanized.
2. Did you keep your New Years’ resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
Hmm. I kinda didn't do any resolutions, or if I did, I forgot'em.
3. Did anyone close to you give birth?
My half sister had another child.
4. Did anyone close to you die?
Jinx, my cat. February 9th. Poor kitty.
5. What countries did you visit?
I've only visited Canada, and that was in 1989 (although I did kayak into Canada in 1999, but didn't set foot on land)! I'm way, way behind on the world-traveling thing. I want to, but need the time and money for it.
6. What would you like to have in 2007 that you lacked in 2006?
Book deal!
7. What dates from 2006 will remain etched upon your memory?
No dates come to mind. I'm terrible at remembering dates.
8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
Getting a short story accepted by a magazine at the beginning of 2006.
9. What was your biggest failure?
Not finding another job!
10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
Hmmm. Nothing chronic. Oh, wait -- I totally wiped out rollerblading last year and fragged my left calf. I still have a scar from that injury, which went from my ankle to my knee. I'll probably have that scar the rest of my life.
11. What was the best thing you bought?
Best thing I bought...probably the memory card for my digital camera! 175 pictures can now be saved on that stinker! That's great!
12. Whose behavior merited celebration?
Mine. I was very industrious last year.
13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?
Mine. I was also terribly undisciplined.
14. Where did most of your money go?
Rent. God, how I hate paying rent.
15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
A book I wrote in November. That really pumped me up.
16. What song/album will always remind you of 2006?
Elliott Smith, "Don't Go Down"
17. Compared to this time last year, are you:
Happier or sadder? Happier!
Thinner or fatter? Thinner!
Richer or poorer? Richer!
18. What do you wish you’d done more of?
Gosh, I dunno. I'm not big on regret.
19. What do you wish you’d done less of?
Less brooding, perhaps.
20. How will you be spending Easter?
Eating a dark chocolate bunny's head.
21. Who did you spend the most time on the phone with?
You know, I so rarely use the phone, anymore, except to talk to my parents, so I guess it's them, by default. I much more frequently e-mail.
22. Did you fall in love in 2006?
Yes!
23. How many one night stands in this last year?
None!
24. What was your favorite TV program?
In 2006? "Invasion" -- that was a great show, which was why it got cancelled, of course.
25. Do you hate anyone now that you didn’t hate this time last year?
Lame as it sounds, I don't waste time on hate. There are people I don't like, sure, but I mostly just deprive them of the joy of knowing me, versus actually hating them, you know?
26. What was the best book(s) you read?
God, I don't even remember. I don't think I read a whole book in 2006! Before you think I'm the Antichrist, let me explain: as an editor, I read every day, almost all day. Not for fun, of course. Anyway, it sort of makes pleasure reading a rarer thing. Ironic, eh?
27. What was your greatest musical discovery?
New bands? Hmmm. Interfuse were pretty good.
Old bands? The Victims (US).
28. What did you want and get?
I never get what I want! Seriously, anything I ask for, I never get. It's like a curse of some sort. I could ask for socks and never get them!
29. What did you want and not get?
Everything!
30. What were your favorite films of this year?
It's been forever since I've seen a movie on the big screen. I really liked the unrated version of "The Descent" -- thought it was a good horror movie.
31. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
I turned 36 last year; I didn't do anything special. Birthday kinda sucked, really.
32. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
Book deal!! Book deal!
33. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2006?
Classical Menswear with a neo-psychedelic twist.
34. What kept you sane?
My madness kept me sane! Knowledge of your own insanity protects you from it. The truly crazy think that they're sane.
35. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
Currently? I'm so terrible about thinking of one on the spot. I know them when I see them. Man, I need to think about it some.
36. What political issue stirred you the most?
Last year? Probably those jackasses leaving New Orleans to drown. That was terrible, unforgiveable. I visited New Orleans in 1997, and hate that government negligence and incompetence destroyed that beautiful place.
37. Who did you miss?
My best friend!
38. Who was the best new person you met?
Ash, for sure. She's the best!
39. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2006.
Don't waste time on regret. Just live in the now, and get things done.
40. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year?
"I met a girl snowball in Hell
She was hard and as cracked as the Liberty Bell
And I got her to
Come and move in with me
And I said I'll find a better place
Where we can spend eternity" (Elliott Smith, "Don't Go Down")
40 things
1. What did you do in 2007 that you’d never done before?
Had my pet euthanized.
2. Did you keep your New Years’ resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
Hmm. I kinda didn't do any resolutions, or if I did, I forgot'em.
3. Did anyone close to you give birth?
My half sister had another child.
4. Did anyone close to you die?
Jinx, my cat. February 9th. Poor kitty.
5. What countries did you visit?
I've only visited Canada, and that was in 1989 (although I did kayak into Canada in 1999, but didn't set foot on land)! I'm way, way behind on the world-traveling thing. I want to, but need the time and money for it.
6. What would you like to have in 2007 that you lacked in 2006?
Book deal!
7. What dates from 2006 will remain etched upon your memory?
No dates come to mind. I'm terrible at remembering dates.
8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
Getting a short story accepted by a magazine at the beginning of 2006.
9. What was your biggest failure?
Not finding another job!
10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
Hmmm. Nothing chronic. Oh, wait -- I totally wiped out rollerblading last year and fragged my left calf. I still have a scar from that injury, which went from my ankle to my knee. I'll probably have that scar the rest of my life.
11. What was the best thing you bought?
Best thing I bought...probably the memory card for my digital camera! 175 pictures can now be saved on that stinker! That's great!
12. Whose behavior merited celebration?
Mine. I was very industrious last year.
13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?
Mine. I was also terribly undisciplined.
14. Where did most of your money go?
Rent. God, how I hate paying rent.
15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
A book I wrote in November. That really pumped me up.
16. What song/album will always remind you of 2006?
Elliott Smith, "Don't Go Down"
17. Compared to this time last year, are you:
Happier or sadder? Happier!
Thinner or fatter? Thinner!
Richer or poorer? Richer!
18. What do you wish you’d done more of?
Gosh, I dunno. I'm not big on regret.
19. What do you wish you’d done less of?
Less brooding, perhaps.
20. How will you be spending Easter?
Eating a dark chocolate bunny's head.
21. Who did you spend the most time on the phone with?
You know, I so rarely use the phone, anymore, except to talk to my parents, so I guess it's them, by default. I much more frequently e-mail.
22. Did you fall in love in 2006?
Yes!
23. How many one night stands in this last year?
None!
24. What was your favorite TV program?
In 2006? "Invasion" -- that was a great show, which was why it got cancelled, of course.
25. Do you hate anyone now that you didn’t hate this time last year?
Lame as it sounds, I don't waste time on hate. There are people I don't like, sure, but I mostly just deprive them of the joy of knowing me, versus actually hating them, you know?
26. What was the best book(s) you read?
God, I don't even remember. I don't think I read a whole book in 2006! Before you think I'm the Antichrist, let me explain: as an editor, I read every day, almost all day. Not for fun, of course. Anyway, it sort of makes pleasure reading a rarer thing. Ironic, eh?
27. What was your greatest musical discovery?
New bands? Hmmm. Interfuse were pretty good.
Old bands? The Victims (US).
28. What did you want and get?
I never get what I want! Seriously, anything I ask for, I never get. It's like a curse of some sort. I could ask for socks and never get them!
29. What did you want and not get?
Everything!
30. What were your favorite films of this year?
It's been forever since I've seen a movie on the big screen. I really liked the unrated version of "The Descent" -- thought it was a good horror movie.
31. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
I turned 36 last year; I didn't do anything special. Birthday kinda sucked, really.
32. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
Book deal!! Book deal!
33. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2006?
Classical Menswear with a neo-psychedelic twist.
34. What kept you sane?
My madness kept me sane! Knowledge of your own insanity protects you from it. The truly crazy think that they're sane.
35. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
Currently? I'm so terrible about thinking of one on the spot. I know them when I see them. Man, I need to think about it some.
36. What political issue stirred you the most?
Last year? Probably those jackasses leaving New Orleans to drown. That was terrible, unforgiveable. I visited New Orleans in 1997, and hate that government negligence and incompetence destroyed that beautiful place.
37. Who did you miss?
My best friend!
38. Who was the best new person you met?
Ash, for sure. She's the best!
39. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2006.
Don't waste time on regret. Just live in the now, and get things done.
40. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year?
"I met a girl snowball in Hell
She was hard and as cracked as the Liberty Bell
And I got her to
Come and move in with me
And I said I'll find a better place
Where we can spend eternity" (Elliott Smith, "Don't Go Down")
Tuesday, February 20, 2007
Years Gone By
----------------10 years ago----------------------
1.) How old were you? 26.
2.) Where did you go to school? I wasn't in school then.
3.) Where did you work? Northwestern University.
4.) Where did you live? Chicago.
5.) Where did you hang out? Bookstores, mostly; some bars to see bands.
6.) Did you wear glasses? Yup.
7.) Who was your best friend? Wife. Chris.
8.) How many tattoos did you have? None.
9.) How many piercings did you have? None.
10.) What car did you drive? Didn't have a car.
11.) Had you been to a real party? Yes.
12.) Had your heart broken? Yes, but not back then; way before.
13.) Single/Taken/Married/Divorced: Married.
----------------5 years ago----------------------
1.) How old were you? 31.
2.) Where did you go to school? Wasn't in school.
3.) Where did you work? Undisclosed major university.
4.) Where did you live? Michigan City, Indiana.
5.) Where did you hang out? At home, mostly.
6.) Did you wear glasses? Yes.
7.) Who were your best friends? Wife. Chris. Denise.
8.) Who was your crush? I have way too many crushes to remember.
9.) How many tattoos did you have? None.
10.) How many piercings did you have? None.
11) What car did you drive? Ford Escort Wagon.
12.) Had you had your heart broken? Nope.
13.) Single/Taken/Married/Divorced/Bitter: Married.
14.) Any kids? The next year.
----------------Feb. 2007----------------------
1.) How old are you? 36.
2.) Where do you work? Undisclosed major university.
3.) Where do you live? Lincoln Park neighborhood (Chicago).
4.) Do you wear glasses? Yes.
5.) Who are your best friends? Wife. Denise. Chris. Ash.
6.) Do you talk to your old friends? Yes.
7.) How many piercings do you have? None!
8.) How many tattoos? None!!!
9.) What kind of car do you have? Ford Escort Wagon (same one).
10.) Has your heart been broken? Not this year.
11.) Single/Taken/Married/Divorced/Bitter? Married.
12.) Who's your crush? Way too many crushes to indicate here.
13.) Any kids? Two boys.
1.) How old were you? 26.
2.) Where did you go to school? I wasn't in school then.
3.) Where did you work? Northwestern University.
4.) Where did you live? Chicago.
5.) Where did you hang out? Bookstores, mostly; some bars to see bands.
6.) Did you wear glasses? Yup.
7.) Who was your best friend? Wife. Chris.
8.) How many tattoos did you have? None.
9.) How many piercings did you have? None.
10.) What car did you drive? Didn't have a car.
11.) Had you been to a real party? Yes.
12.) Had your heart broken? Yes, but not back then; way before.
13.) Single/Taken/Married/Divorced: Married.
----------------5 years ago----------------------
1.) How old were you? 31.
2.) Where did you go to school? Wasn't in school.
3.) Where did you work? Undisclosed major university.
4.) Where did you live? Michigan City, Indiana.
5.) Where did you hang out? At home, mostly.
6.) Did you wear glasses? Yes.
7.) Who were your best friends? Wife. Chris. Denise.
8.) Who was your crush? I have way too many crushes to remember.
9.) How many tattoos did you have? None.
10.) How many piercings did you have? None.
11) What car did you drive? Ford Escort Wagon.
12.) Had you had your heart broken? Nope.
13.) Single/Taken/Married/Divorced/Bitter: Married.
14.) Any kids? The next year.
----------------Feb. 2007----------------------
1.) How old are you? 36.
2.) Where do you work? Undisclosed major university.
3.) Where do you live? Lincoln Park neighborhood (Chicago).
4.) Do you wear glasses? Yes.
5.) Who are your best friends? Wife. Denise. Chris. Ash.
6.) Do you talk to your old friends? Yes.
7.) How many piercings do you have? None!
8.) How many tattoos? None!!!
9.) What kind of car do you have? Ford Escort Wagon (same one).
10.) Has your heart been broken? Not this year.
11.) Single/Taken/Married/Divorced/Bitter? Married.
12.) Who's your crush? Way too many crushes to indicate here.
13.) Any kids? Two boys.
Leave Me Be
The Zombies, "Leave Me Be"
If it seems that I'm too quiet, that's 'cause I'm missin' her
My mind tells me I have to fight, but I can't help missin' her
CHORUS:
You'd better leave me alone, you'd better leave me alone
Until I can think about her without feelin' sorry for myself
You'd better leave me be till I don't need her anymore
I don't wanna see her again until I'm sure I'm over her
But still feeling tired & wanting is not like I thought it would be
Love just cannot end at parting; my world's dropped from under me
If it seems that I'm too quiet, that's 'cause I'm missin' her
My mind tells me I have to fight, but I can't help missin' her
CHORUS:
You'd better leave me alone, you'd better leave me alone
Until I can think about her without feelin' sorry for myself
You'd better leave me be till I don't need her anymore
I don't wanna see her again until I'm sure I'm over her
But still feeling tired & wanting is not like I thought it would be
Love just cannot end at parting; my world's dropped from under me
Monday, February 19, 2007
The Descent is Decent
I liked "The Descent" (2005) -- I watched the unrated version on DVD. It's a pretty decent horror flick. I liked the all-female cast of main characters. That was a good touch, and I think they handled themselves well, given the genre. It was well-shot. The cave scenes were really claustrophobia-inducing. I'm not claustrophobic, but those cave sequences made me feel that way.
Good stuff, made me jump. Definitely get the unrated version, if you're going to watch it -- it has the original ending, versus the "happy" ending they used for American audiences. You know Americans and our happy endings!
Good stuff, made me jump. Definitely get the unrated version, if you're going to watch it -- it has the original ending, versus the "happy" ending they used for American audiences. You know Americans and our happy endings!
Saturday, February 17, 2007
Then again
I'm only six posts short of 300 on this, so maybe once I reach 300, then I'll mothball this one.
Friday, February 16, 2007
Hurm
Wow, this blog's dying by inches (or centimeters, if you're metrically-inclined). Either everybody's lurking, or nobody's coming around anymore. Not that I blame you. I've been boring myself, too!
I made this one a sanctuary from some human flotsam that was dogging me on some earlier blogs, and in that respect, this place has remained flotsam-free. But also, it's always been a kind of secret satellite around my main blog, which is linked to my profile, if you'd like to drop by where things are generally more active.
So, I'll mothball this blog for the time being, and focus on the other one. The only thing I'd ask if you turn up at the core blog is that you don't refer to this blog there, because there are still some toxic lurkers on that one, and I wouldn't want them to be able to backtrack to this one.
Not like it's a big problem; if they did turn up here, I'd just delete this blog and be done with it. The reason I haven't fragged my latest core blog is because I'd torched two earlier blogs before creating this one as a refuge -- and I decided I didn't want to keep nuking blogs just because of some psycho stalkers.
Anyway, thanks for your time and attention here, whoever you are! Just click on the blog on my profile and you'll see me again.
Otherwise, nothing's cooking here until further notice.
I made this one a sanctuary from some human flotsam that was dogging me on some earlier blogs, and in that respect, this place has remained flotsam-free. But also, it's always been a kind of secret satellite around my main blog, which is linked to my profile, if you'd like to drop by where things are generally more active.
So, I'll mothball this blog for the time being, and focus on the other one. The only thing I'd ask if you turn up at the core blog is that you don't refer to this blog there, because there are still some toxic lurkers on that one, and I wouldn't want them to be able to backtrack to this one.
Not like it's a big problem; if they did turn up here, I'd just delete this blog and be done with it. The reason I haven't fragged my latest core blog is because I'd torched two earlier blogs before creating this one as a refuge -- and I decided I didn't want to keep nuking blogs just because of some psycho stalkers.
Anyway, thanks for your time and attention here, whoever you are! Just click on the blog on my profile and you'll see me again.
Otherwise, nothing's cooking here until further notice.
Thursday, February 15, 2007
Who Are You?
You scored as Keith Moon.
Which member of the Who are you??? created with QuizFarm.com |
Weirdness, cont'd.
Okay, so I already did the six weird things meme, but Kristen reminded me of another one, so I'm adding a seventh weird thing, figuring that a meme about weird things should at least have an odd number to it, instead of an even...
7. I can't stand to have anything between my toes, most especially between my big toe and the rest. Like flip-flops, or a finger, or a sock, or anything. Even the sight of it gives me the willies -- like those otherwise really cool Japanese slippers one sees -- just seeing the big toe isolated like that freaks me out. It's not the same as being ticklish. Like if you popped a finger between my big toe and my other toes, I'd recoil, try to flee. I could probably be tortured that way. The sensation is just horrible to me -- not pain, not even irritation, exactly, just serious discomfort. Any sandals I wear are the kind that go over the toes, not between. *shudder*
7. I can't stand to have anything between my toes, most especially between my big toe and the rest. Like flip-flops, or a finger, or a sock, or anything. Even the sight of it gives me the willies -- like those otherwise really cool Japanese slippers one sees -- just seeing the big toe isolated like that freaks me out. It's not the same as being ticklish. Like if you popped a finger between my big toe and my other toes, I'd recoil, try to flee. I could probably be tortured that way. The sensation is just horrible to me -- not pain, not even irritation, exactly, just serious discomfort. Any sandals I wear are the kind that go over the toes, not between. *shudder*
Hey, there
Hope everybody had a great V-Day.
Wherever you are, keep warm. Chicago got hit with lots of wintery snow t'other day.
I have no fancy plans for the day. Just slack-working, the usual deal.
Here's a great new video from Jarvis Cocker...
"Don't Let Him Waste Your Time"
I think I've ridden with cabbies like that in Chicago!
Wherever you are, keep warm. Chicago got hit with lots of wintery snow t'other day.
I have no fancy plans for the day. Just slack-working, the usual deal.
Here's a great new video from Jarvis Cocker...
"Don't Let Him Waste Your Time"
I think I've ridden with cabbies like that in Chicago!
Tuesday, February 13, 2007
Snow way!
It's blizzardy out today -- frickin' gusty winds blowing snow every which way. Really nasty.
Definitely a classic Chicagoland winter in effect. If you're east of me, you're going to likely get hit, too, because it's a big storm system. Be ready.
I'm in a better mood today than I was yesterday. That's good.
Definitely a classic Chicagoland winter in effect. If you're east of me, you're going to likely get hit, too, because it's a big storm system. Be ready.
I'm in a better mood today than I was yesterday. That's good.
Monday, February 12, 2007
Enough is Enough?
Music: Love Battery, "Nebraska"
I'm in much better spirits than I was last week, although I went from sad to mad today; kind of in a bad mood, but by comparison, anger is a welcome relief from grief.
People wear me out sometimes. I lead with my heart, if not with my chin, and I think I feel that my exuberance can carry the day in any situation. But it can't. Energy wanes, hopes fade, ambitions dim, regrets pile up like bones on a battlefield. It's frustrating.
At some point, you grow up -- you realize you simply can't have and do everything you want to do; you have to pick and choose. It's a very American kind of conundrum. I want it all. I want it now. I can't have it all -- hell, I can't even have most of it. All I get is some. If I'm very lucky.
I'm very loyal to what friends I have; is there such thing as being too loyal? It's not in my nature to give up on somebody. That, to me, would feel like a betrayal. So I end up in situations where I'm better friends to people than they are to me, and in the position of, what, exactly? Not being friends anymore? Or just tossing my pride by the wayside and being The Good Friend(tm) without expectation of reciprocity?
I have no answer. I'm very much all-or-nothing; I can't be a sorta friend with somebody. If I'm your friend, I stick by you -- to me, that's inherent in my conception of friendship. It's because there's something about you that I consider worthwhile. Maybe there are a lot of things about you. I've never thought about it systematically, like what my cutoff point is.
Perhaps, at heart, it's also a desire to be loved -- also a very American problem. We want everybody to like us, to love us, and when they don't, we get pissed at them, blame them. That's our foreign policy in a nutshell, really.
Then again, how do you really know a friend is your friend? Everything's pinned on trust, I guess. No trust, no friendship. Simple as that.
I don't know how famous actors and other celebrities deal with it. Like, do they rely on family and what friends they had before they got famous? How could you trust a newcomer on the scene, somebody who wanted to befriend you? Could you trust them? Then again, a celebrity would have so much social hand on anybody, probably only another celebrity could hope to be an actual friend to them -- sort of like how fashion models marry rock stars, for example.
If I were famous, I'd probably be reclusive, just because it's hard for me to trust people; I'm a natural critic and I'm usually likely to see the very worst in a situation or in a person (and I'm usually right about them, too, if I've actually studied them), and inclined to be influenced by that view.
In general, I'm open and affable, quick to laugh -- easy for somebody to befriend, at least up to a point. But beyond that point, it's like there's a definite wall I have to broader intimacy. I'm easy to get to know, and hard to understand.
Blah blah blah.
I'm in much better spirits than I was last week, although I went from sad to mad today; kind of in a bad mood, but by comparison, anger is a welcome relief from grief.
People wear me out sometimes. I lead with my heart, if not with my chin, and I think I feel that my exuberance can carry the day in any situation. But it can't. Energy wanes, hopes fade, ambitions dim, regrets pile up like bones on a battlefield. It's frustrating.
At some point, you grow up -- you realize you simply can't have and do everything you want to do; you have to pick and choose. It's a very American kind of conundrum. I want it all. I want it now. I can't have it all -- hell, I can't even have most of it. All I get is some. If I'm very lucky.
I'm very loyal to what friends I have; is there such thing as being too loyal? It's not in my nature to give up on somebody. That, to me, would feel like a betrayal. So I end up in situations where I'm better friends to people than they are to me, and in the position of, what, exactly? Not being friends anymore? Or just tossing my pride by the wayside and being The Good Friend(tm) without expectation of reciprocity?
I have no answer. I'm very much all-or-nothing; I can't be a sorta friend with somebody. If I'm your friend, I stick by you -- to me, that's inherent in my conception of friendship. It's because there's something about you that I consider worthwhile. Maybe there are a lot of things about you. I've never thought about it systematically, like what my cutoff point is.
Perhaps, at heart, it's also a desire to be loved -- also a very American problem. We want everybody to like us, to love us, and when they don't, we get pissed at them, blame them. That's our foreign policy in a nutshell, really.
Then again, how do you really know a friend is your friend? Everything's pinned on trust, I guess. No trust, no friendship. Simple as that.
I don't know how famous actors and other celebrities deal with it. Like, do they rely on family and what friends they had before they got famous? How could you trust a newcomer on the scene, somebody who wanted to befriend you? Could you trust them? Then again, a celebrity would have so much social hand on anybody, probably only another celebrity could hope to be an actual friend to them -- sort of like how fashion models marry rock stars, for example.
If I were famous, I'd probably be reclusive, just because it's hard for me to trust people; I'm a natural critic and I'm usually likely to see the very worst in a situation or in a person (and I'm usually right about them, too, if I've actually studied them), and inclined to be influenced by that view.
In general, I'm open and affable, quick to laugh -- easy for somebody to befriend, at least up to a point. But beyond that point, it's like there's a definite wall I have to broader intimacy. I'm easy to get to know, and hard to understand.
Blah blah blah.
Friday, February 09, 2007
Dearly Departed
I had to take Jinx to the animal hospital to be euthanized. The poor little kitty held on for another night, and it was too sad to see her silently suffering, weakening. She managed a last purr for me last night, as I combed her and tried to make her more comfortable.
The vet said she had acute renal failure, that it was common for cats her age. We figured it was something that, although it certainly didn't make it any easier.
Jinx: 1992-2007.
The vet said she had acute renal failure, that it was common for cats her age. We figured it was something that, although it certainly didn't make it any easier.
Jinx: 1992-2007.
Thursday, February 08, 2007
Weirdness
Romina cheered me up (gracias!), and a meme is always a nice distraction, and this is kind of a tough one, requiring thought...
Six weird things about me
1. My thumbs don't bend in the middle; how to explain? I have the joint right after the thumbnail, and then nothing, then it bends where it connects to the hand. You know how people's thumbs hyperextend if too much pressure is applied? Not mine. I have regressive thumbs -- they're more like power grip thumbs, versus precision grip thumbs, which most people have. They do help me carry things and climb better, I find. But such thumbs are what our primate ancestors had, so they're throwback thumbs, not future mutant thumbs.
2. I used to want to be a fighter pilot as a kid; I used to love to fly. Then, in 1997 and 1998, I became totally phobic about flying, and haven't flown since then. I can't really account for it, to be honest. Some kind of existential angst thing, fear of being a passenger, a control issue. I feel like if I were flying on my own, I'd be fine with it; it's the helplessness of being a passenger that gets to me. Same reason rollercoasters have historically made me very uncomfortable.
3. I have texture issues with food -- anything like jello, whipped cream, aspic, anything frothy -- it makes the hair on my arms stand on end; I won't eat it. I'd puke if I had to eat anything goopy like that. I used to not be able to each peaches -- the fuzzy skin would give me the willies. But I got over it at some point, and now I love'em.
4. My brain is like an automatic mood jukebox -- it'll unconsciously come up with a theme-appropriate song that I'll hum or sing or whistle, without actually being aware that it somehow ties into the situation, until I'm doing it and will think *Hey, that relates to what I'm doing right now.* I think it's a left-handed thing, the whole right-brain dominant thing. Unfortunately, I can't think of any examples at the moment, but it happens all the time.
5. Another left-handed thing -- sometimes I'll be at a loss for words, and my brain'll stitch together words to encompass the word I was trying to say to begin with. For example, if the word I wanted was "comb" -- "Could you pass me the comb?" -- what I'd actually say would be "Could you pass me the..uhh..spikey hair stick?" Which is a very right-brained way of interpreting a comb, when you think about it. I do that all the time.
6. I'm very nihilistic, but at the same time, think that life is sacred -- it's like the meaninglessness of the universe to me makes our own existence all the more special, makes love and life and laughter all the more vital. Even though I don't think there's any higher meaning to our lives, and that at some point an asteroid will come and wipe out human life (if we haven't wiped ourselves out first), at the same time, it somehow increases the value of life to me. I extend that to all life -- like if there's a bug in the house, I'll catch it and set it free, versus squishing it. I'm very anti-war and anti-death penalty because of that attitude; anti-poverty for the same reason -- if this is all there is, as I see it, we owe it to ourselves (and to everything living) to make it as good as it can be. The very pointlessness of our existence provides the motive and the meaning for our existence to me, weirdly enough.
Six weird things about me
1. My thumbs don't bend in the middle; how to explain? I have the joint right after the thumbnail, and then nothing, then it bends where it connects to the hand. You know how people's thumbs hyperextend if too much pressure is applied? Not mine. I have regressive thumbs -- they're more like power grip thumbs, versus precision grip thumbs, which most people have. They do help me carry things and climb better, I find. But such thumbs are what our primate ancestors had, so they're throwback thumbs, not future mutant thumbs.
2. I used to want to be a fighter pilot as a kid; I used to love to fly. Then, in 1997 and 1998, I became totally phobic about flying, and haven't flown since then. I can't really account for it, to be honest. Some kind of existential angst thing, fear of being a passenger, a control issue. I feel like if I were flying on my own, I'd be fine with it; it's the helplessness of being a passenger that gets to me. Same reason rollercoasters have historically made me very uncomfortable.
3. I have texture issues with food -- anything like jello, whipped cream, aspic, anything frothy -- it makes the hair on my arms stand on end; I won't eat it. I'd puke if I had to eat anything goopy like that. I used to not be able to each peaches -- the fuzzy skin would give me the willies. But I got over it at some point, and now I love'em.
4. My brain is like an automatic mood jukebox -- it'll unconsciously come up with a theme-appropriate song that I'll hum or sing or whistle, without actually being aware that it somehow ties into the situation, until I'm doing it and will think *Hey, that relates to what I'm doing right now.* I think it's a left-handed thing, the whole right-brain dominant thing. Unfortunately, I can't think of any examples at the moment, but it happens all the time.
5. Another left-handed thing -- sometimes I'll be at a loss for words, and my brain'll stitch together words to encompass the word I was trying to say to begin with. For example, if the word I wanted was "comb" -- "Could you pass me the comb?" -- what I'd actually say would be "Could you pass me the..uhh..spikey hair stick?" Which is a very right-brained way of interpreting a comb, when you think about it. I do that all the time.
6. I'm very nihilistic, but at the same time, think that life is sacred -- it's like the meaninglessness of the universe to me makes our own existence all the more special, makes love and life and laughter all the more vital. Even though I don't think there's any higher meaning to our lives, and that at some point an asteroid will come and wipe out human life (if we haven't wiped ourselves out first), at the same time, it somehow increases the value of life to me. I extend that to all life -- like if there's a bug in the house, I'll catch it and set it free, versus squishing it. I'm very anti-war and anti-death penalty because of that attitude; anti-poverty for the same reason -- if this is all there is, as I see it, we owe it to ourselves (and to everything living) to make it as good as it can be. The very pointlessness of our existence provides the motive and the meaning for our existence to me, weirdly enough.
Jinx
From a couple of years ago; not the best picture I have of her, but the best I could find at the moment.
Wednesday, February 07, 2007
Hey...
Does anybody still read this blog? There have to be a few lurkers out there, right? Not that it's been very interesting at the moment, I'll admit.
My cat, Jinx, is dying. I think she'll be dead either today, tonight, or tomorrow. She's old -- she's over 15 years old, and has lost most of her weight, won't eat or drink, and is definitely close to her end. She was a great cat, definitely my cat -- I was her favorite person by far; she hated most everybody else, but liked me. My older son said "she needs some new stripey legs; we can get a doctor to get her new legs." He's such a sweetie, my little engineer.
Anyway, I cried last night, combed and petted her; I didn't want to take her off to a place, where she'd be surrounded by strange things and strangers. Instead, I put a soft towel and a water dish near one of our radiators, and carried her there to sleep, so she'd at least be comfortable and warm. I've never had a pet before, never had to deal with the death of one. Makes me sad -- seeing her be so feline-stoic, keeping a brave face on her sickness, was just heartbreaking to me. Would that we could all die with such grace.
Her brother, Newt, is still strong and in good health; he's got a few more years in him, by the look of him.
Anyway, it'll be soon. I'll try to take a good picture of her to post, once she dies.
My cat, Jinx, is dying. I think she'll be dead either today, tonight, or tomorrow. She's old -- she's over 15 years old, and has lost most of her weight, won't eat or drink, and is definitely close to her end. She was a great cat, definitely my cat -- I was her favorite person by far; she hated most everybody else, but liked me. My older son said "she needs some new stripey legs; we can get a doctor to get her new legs." He's such a sweetie, my little engineer.
Anyway, I cried last night, combed and petted her; I didn't want to take her off to a place, where she'd be surrounded by strange things and strangers. Instead, I put a soft towel and a water dish near one of our radiators, and carried her there to sleep, so she'd at least be comfortable and warm. I've never had a pet before, never had to deal with the death of one. Makes me sad -- seeing her be so feline-stoic, keeping a brave face on her sickness, was just heartbreaking to me. Would that we could all die with such grace.
Her brother, Newt, is still strong and in good health; he's got a few more years in him, by the look of him.
Anyway, it'll be soon. I'll try to take a good picture of her to post, once she dies.
Tuesday, February 06, 2007
Linda Harrison
She was "Nova" in "Planet of the Apes" and was Wonder Woman in a late 60s pilot that was never picked up. She's hot stuff...
Friday, February 02, 2007
Ads
I love this one. "What'd you call me?" -- the way the guy delivers that line is classic!
And this older one still makes me laugh, especially how the smacking sound keeps going past the actual film clip.
And this older one still makes me laugh, especially how the smacking sound keeps going past the actual film clip.
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